My Naked Ass

there was a guy named ass
who rode upon this fine ass
he scratched his balls
saw water falls
and got my hoof in his ass

there was was a girl named tass
who had a fantastic ass
not pretty and pink
as you may think
but old and grey, eating grass.

Mommy? Is that You?  No, sorry kid foal,  that’s a horse.  Your mom is dead.

Yes, some asshole shot your mom.

We live in an unfortunate world where killing and abusing animals is hilarious to retarded teens and human children.

Dammit, I’m starting to sound like a fucking activist.  Maybe I need to go out and carry some shit for a human.

This cute little fella probably won’t survive.  It’s sad.

Continue reading Mommy? Is that You?

This is clearly abuse.

Animal abuse.  This fat bastard weighs fifty times more than the donkey itself.  Who’s idea was this?  Was it the handler? Was it the rider? I do know it certainly wasn’t the donkey’s idea.

If it was the handler he should have a swift donkey kick to the nuts. But he probably doesn’t have any nuts if he let this fat bastard ride my good friend.

But lets talk about the fat bastard.  Why would he think it’s a good idea to ride a donkey?  Don’t you think he should be going someplace that has something more his size, like an elephant? Yeah. That’d be smart.  Stop abusing us!

Video after the jump.
Continue reading Seriously, Give These Asses a Break.

Shrek the Musical is going to be opening in Chicago.  Sure, the people on that news page seem to think that this is a sign of theatre being killed.  But c’mon, shrek has one of the best donkey’s in the world!

Ok, Maybe it is a bad sign.

Actually, it is.  It’s a horrible horrible idea. I’ve seen a lot of bad ideas in my life and this is definitely one of them.  I mean, really, did they have to do this?

Can’t we just leave the funny comedy as an animated special with too many sequels?

Much like hollywood, it appears that the theatre industry is completely out of fresh ideas.

These guys need a good swift kick in the gut by an angry donkey.